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[personal profile] ladyegreen
This started off as a comment on a friend's journal and it was getting long in tooth. I moved it here.

Sometimes life just sucks, it's okay to acknowledge that, at least it is with me.

To those of us who are not making it, or are just barely squeaking by:

I'm only making it because a good friend paid the last giant electric bill, another provided groceries, and my husband had an unexpected spurt of overtime. You know what? It sucks living like that.

I kind of feel like that's my role to play in all this madness so many of us are going through, I'm going to be one of those that walks through the heartache, grief, humiliation (and all of us struggling feel this, not one of us wants to be here), and every once in awhile be the one to bald face acknowledge that it sucks being poor, it sucks having to sweat if you can pay your rent, and it sucks worrying about your loved ones.

Because I've noticed this about the net (and in analog life)whenever someone vents about their situation a few things happen. Some people fall silent, they don't know what to say. Some people are silent because they are being judgmental pricks that think you should have done something differently, whatever, those people do well to keep their mouth shut and their fingers off the keyboard. Some people are offer hugs and love, share that they know the feeling (oh, yay, my group) and wish you (or whomever) well.

And then we have the last two, one who is trying to help, and one who is hijacking but may not know they are being malicious. We have the bluebird warblers who want to post something uplifting and have a silver lining, God or Goddess Bless them, they are trying to help. And God or Goddess Bless me, some times I just want to take a damn frying pan to their head. Shut up and let me (or anyone) be miserable for a moment so we can acknowledge reality instead of wishful thinking and re-compose ourselves.

But we all know they are just trying to help and sometimes their's is the voice we most hope to hear because sometimes we desperately need that cheer. So bless them some more may we never lose them.

The last sort... hmmmmmm. The last sort are the ones who want to tell you how horrible they or someone else had it so you can realize by contrast just how well your life is going in comparison. I truly, truly, believe most of these people are really trying to help but like the warblers, they don't know when to cut back some. Being online it's hard to tell when a swift kick to the pants is needed and when it's not. So they unfortunately are the ones that make you feel worse about yourself because it comes across as being schooled, in public, or in a private space that you thought you were safe, for whining.

Which no upset person who is going through trauma needs. Ever.

So I'll say it for those who don't want to come across as whining or ungrateful or just ugly.

Being poor is not heart lifting and it is rarely a choice. Being poor is hard. Being poor means not being able to care for yourself, which is humiliating. Being poor means not being able to provide for your loved ones, which is not just humiliating, it breaks your heart, over and over and over again.

Furthermore, I don't care about your political persuasion but if you really believe 47% percent of Americans just want a government that gives them a hand out than I guess I'll have to get out my big paint brush and say something just as brash, huh? Which is this, are you insane? I don't care that you personally know a mooch. Everyone personally knows a mooch. Good for you.

But the vast majority of people you know are not moochers and you shouldn't treat them as such. Ever.

Elderly, disabled, people trapped in repressed areas, and the working poor do not need your judgmental nonsense and especially not through the holidays.

Okay, I'll go stuff my soapbox away until the next time. Take care and love everyone.

Need tea.
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November 2014

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