Project Me

Jul. 1st, 2012 08:58 pm
ladyegreen: (Default)
[personal profile] ladyegreen
I'm glad to lay this year's June to rest. It was a hard month.

This is a State of the Ladye address, expect rambling and odd bits.

There is a tremendous storm outside at the moment with rolling thunder and much lightening. Very atmospheric. Fantastically, it dropped the temperature several degrees.

I'm having a bit of consumer/internet/modern life saturation and am looking for ways to release some of the pressure. There was a secret on post secret that spoke to me, of me, all though it is not my secret.


That's kind of sad isn't it? Ahh, well, life tends to happen along the way and we all do as we can I suppose. I'm struggling with my attention span lately, having a hard time remaining focused on any one thing. My ADD is acting up significantly. I also tend towards the theory that the internet is training many of us to have shorter attention spans. Filed under flaws I don't like and traits to be worked on.

My daughter is still off in Texas/New Mexico. I wish she was home. My mind isn't able to let go of its worries. I chew my nails, metaphorically, every day. I have no idea how I am going to adjust when both the children are grown and moved out. If my son is to be believed that moment will never come as far as he is concerned. Me being me, that just translates into me worrying about his emotional maturity. I have a bad case of mother hen complex I'm afraid.

I'm having a spell of weariness with the world. It comes and it goes. Still struggling with the faulty filter in my brain, entering a period of silence again, before I was having a problem keeping my mouth shut when things irritated me (or people). It really bothered me that I often found a sarcastic reply flying out of my mouth before I could stop it. Now I'm kind of curled in on myself and seeking the quiet. I'm not amused or engaged with the vast amount of deliberate ignorance I see going on these days. It's a horrible, slithery feeling in my spine, yeah? My Facebook has seen me using the feature to block posts quite a bit recently. I suppose I'll kick back out again in a few months and pick up where I left off, tackling sensitive subjects and ideas and trying to make a change for the good. Nothing with me ever lasts, not even my personality, it'll all come round again.

Sipping tea and quiet for now though.

Date: 2012-07-03 02:38 am (UTC)
From: [personal profile] biscuit1001
{{{big hugs and freshly laundered snuggles}}}

Date: 2012-07-02 06:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Sending tea, oranges, and lots of off-key singing!!! Ready? ..... *giggle*

Date: 2012-07-03 04:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I find myself being my father's son in unexpected ways. I love technology, but I get exasperated with the level of connectedness most people seem to expect now. They must always be texting, checking e-mail, looking at/posting on Facebook, Tweeting, or otherwise "plugged in" at all times or they get "bored" or "anxious."

There is a part of me that finds this to be a problem. Some of it was my strange upbringing. My weird survivalist father was always emphasizing the ability to be still and quiet, to empty my mind or focus it on things to the exclusion of outside stimuli. That, and being constantly aware of my surroundings seem to both be things that completely alien to most people in this culture, so much so that I often can't even explain the concept to people.

I need to work on adapting to changes in society. But I can't help getting slightly annoyed with adults who can't hold a conversation or sit through a meeting without playing on their "smart" phones. I worry about a generation of children who will need constant stimulation to do anything, and will shut down if something isn't electronic and interactive. That seems like a recipe for disaster to me.

Or maybe I'm just getting old. :) And yes, I realize the irony of posting this on a social media site...


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